A Friend to all is a Friend to None

Posted by Mattie on Jul 22, 2012 in Womanhood |

I am not a techy by any means. It takes me forever to adopt technology and the Internet. Yes, I surf and research, but I don’t ride it the way many others do. I am a bystander, at best.

I started Facebook-ing (that is a new word) a few years ago and got so many requests to have friends that I had to inactivate my account. I was overwhelmed with so many people wanting to be my friend. Imagine that, so many people wanted to be my friend. An honour? Maybe not. A bit of competition mixed with horror. Maybe yes.

After having over 100 friends, some work related, some strangers, I stopped posting. I did not want everyone to know everything about me.  Where is the fun in that? It is amazing to me that people actually have 200 friends.

In fact, could it be competition? Look at me, look at my fantastic life. Look what I am doing. Could we call that bragging? Some call it sharing. I think there is a fine line here.

The horror sets in when many people don’t post anything about their lives. They only read about other people’s lives. Maybe we can call them voyeurs? They are certainly not sharing. What exactly are they doing? I have decided 30 friends and one husband is good enough for me.

Now that the paranoia is out of my system, I have activated my account. This time, I tried to control the amount of friends that I wanted. But, I did not want to insult anyone. At first I was everybody’s friend, and then discreetly unfriended them. I felt as though, I was stabbing them in the back! Now, I just don’t accept all the friend requests. Sorry, please don’t take it personally.

What made me laugh about Facebook, others, and myself is that it took me 3 months to make my husband, my husband and not my friend. Doesn’t that sound bizarre? Once I figured out, that my husband should not be my friend, (I am not even going to go there) I switched him to his rightful status, as my husband. I got so many posts congratulating me. For what? Getting married or figuring out how to use Facebook.

I started Facebook-ing because I felt as though, I was missing out on something important in this virtual social circle. It didn’t take me long to figure out, that I wasn’t missing out on anything. Just wasting some of my precious time.

Although, I have to say it is a great way to keep in touch with people whom you don’t see often, because they live in another country. My husband is part of a group of childhood friends from England and they seem to have a lot of fun reminiscing.

But, if we see each other often, why don’t we actually talk to one another, instead of posting everything we do? I guess it easier to tell everyone everything, instead of individualizing our conversation and actually giving people our attention.

Signing out,

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